I was born on a year ending in 0, and that for some reason has a resonance with me. Probably because another decade has passed, but 2020 to me means a lot. I’m 40. This is a milestone, FORTY! I’ve lived a strange life, and because of that I feel immature in a lot of ways. I still struggle with figuring out who I am. Is that ridiculous? Maybe, maybe not. I mean, I know who I am but I don’t know why I sometimes do what I do, or behave how I behave.
Maybe it’s because I just turned 40 that I’m doing an assessment of my life. My life, in all fairness is great! I’m married to the most patient, understanding and caring man I could’ve asked for. I have an incredible job that allows me freedom to work from anywhere. I live in a home that we own. So there’s really nothing to complain about. The things I’m looking at are deeper, like why do I drink to much? Why do I not utilize my time better? I think I’ve been given so many gifts and am not utilizing them, almost like I’m kiboshing my own success because I feel I’m not worth it.
These are all the things that have been going through my head in the last 24 hours.
Making attainable changes
I’ve read a couple blogs recently about resolutions. People set these lofty goals on New Years and most give up by February. I can recommend setting smaller goals, goals that may take time to achieve but will lead up to a huge change over time.
What I’ve been doing over the last month is really focusing on small work outs. I don’t have a time of time to spend hours a day exercising, but what I can do is 30 minutes in the morning and when I have time throughout the day jump down and pound out some crunches or whatever.
I am still working towards my goal of not drinking throughout the week. I don’t know what it is about sales people, we all seem to drink more than most. It could be that our jobs are stressful, or that often when you meet with clients it’s over drinks, dinner etc. So…when I am not meeting with clients I don’t need to have a drink after work.
First post of the year
This is my first post this year and another focus of mine is to be brutally honest with myself and share my struggles and successes. The only way forward is up!
Thanks for reading and I look forward to sharing more!
I spent Monday at the dentist which as usual left me feeling anxious and in pain. I have spent a lot of time at the dentist throughout my life and none of it was due to cavities, all due to bone and gum issues. It’s honestly very frustrating. Most of my issues are hereditary but I had some poor behaviours in my 20’s that didn’t help. I have another 5 or so appointments and I should be done! Because of this surgery this week is a recovery week.
The benefit to having a recovery week is I get to study for my new role. I start a new career on Monday and I am thrilled. As I mentioned in my previous post I’ve been struggling with my current job because the market is so difficult to manage. My new role allows me to control where I go and how I approach potential clients. My new title is Western Canada Channel Account Manager. Sounds like a mouthful doesn’t it? I get to work from home for the majority of the time because of technology I can connect with clients remotely. I will have to travel from time to time which is also cool. I won’t be locked into one place just waiting for clients to come to me anymore.
This new beginning is a game changer for my husband and I. He works in the same field and also works remotely. We will be working Monday through Friday, be able to take vacations together easily. Can work from a campsite if we wanted too, as long as we have internet and phone connections.
I’ve never been one to settle, I’ve always pushed towards bettering my life. If a job doesn’t fit I persist until something better comes along. They say your 40’s are the money making years. So let’s go!
There are so many plans we hope to achieve and the end result is getting closer. We have done a ton of research and planning and everything is lining up. The biggest hurdle we are facing now is timing. For the business model we are looking to launch and to be profitable would have to start about now. And we won’t be ready until August.
So the question is, do we hold off and continue planning and make sure every I is dotted and T is crossed and launch next season? Or do we just go for it and see what happens. My gut says hold off but my heart says go for it.
My heart has led me into hazardous situations before. It’s not always about love, mostly passion. I become so passionate about something that it takes hold of me. Sometimes that’s a good thing, sometimes it leads to poor decisions.
I know I haven’t divulged what this business is. I’m keeping it on the down low for a reason. It would be the first of its kind in Canada. That’s a big deal. Which is why I know it will work. I’ve seen this type of business thrive in many parts of the world. I’ve been doing my due diligence, and research and case studies and I know it in my gut that it will work.
So what next
Honestly there are still so many parts that need to line up before we can launch. The city has approved a permit program for us, “step one”. We have a knowledge of most of the financials, but have yet to get financing. I have a few phone calls yet to make in that regard. The government has many grant programs to help us which would cover a large chunk of the start up costs and also loan programs for the rest. It’s completely viable but still scary. I’ve never started a business of this magnitude. I’ve done a few side hustles before, but this could lend itself to total independence if done right.
So there it is
We are just a few steps away from making this happen. But since it’s a season permitting business, do we launch in August, or do we wait? That is the question.